Mama said there would be {weeks} like this...

You know those weeks...

The ones where both your children have CHICKENPOX (which by the way you CAN still get if you have been vaccinated!  AND please save the vaccination debate for elsewhere)!  The same week that the backyard got a facelift and new turf that we can't play on for 2 weeks! The same week that had such excruciatingly beautiful weather and all we could do was look longingly out the window! 

The kind of week where you "punish" the kids by taking away the iPad for 2 months and you realize you are only punishing yourself at 7:30 at night when they are so bored of playing superheros and reading they have resorted to sitting on the couch staring at the wall.

The same kind of week where your 4 year old crawls into bed with you every single night AND pees EVERY. SINGLE.NIGHT!  The ONE night he pees in his own bed the dog pukes in yours! 

The same kind of week where you wish and pray that your husband had sick days, holiday days or heck even some money in your savings account so he could be home living the same misery as you!

The same kind of week where you send your husband to the store and your debit card AND your credit card get declined so he pays for your milk with dimes...

And this morning it's back to school for my oldest (just in time for Sports Day) and back to our routine for me and my youngest!  And I think I may miss him!  Good thing summer starts in a week!

Life with the Internet

The internet. It feels like it's been around for my entire lifetime. But using social media it is now a daily staple in staying "connected" and I have a love/hate relationship quite like no other!

I am thankful that Social media has allowed me to reconnect with old friends, stay connected with friends and family in different areas around the world, make new business connections and some new personal connections as well!

But we are living in a society where our virtual life is quickly over taking real life!  Our Social media lives are "edited".  Each photo selected to portray us is scrutinized to make sure we look our best, we post photos of our "perfect" children.  We boast about our triumphs and our wins!  Sure there is the occasional "train wreck" who posts every single pathetic detail (and you just can't look away right?), the occasional heart wrenching personal story when we need to pull together and support someone but our daily virtual lives are far from raw and far from real!

When I was a little girl I remember my mom talking on the phone for what seemed liked hours!  She would talk to her mom, her sister, her friends and the neighbours.  I remember the "not right now, I'm on the phone" if I interrupted her (and the JESSICA, I'm on the phone shhhhhht" that often followed when I interrupted her subsequent times!  My children aren't even sure how to act if I'm on the phone, my call display only consists of the dentist and our parents (call display that's another topic), this mom doesn't chat on the phone.  I send my friends a quick text for their birthdays, an email invite for parties, a Facebook message if I want to chat but rarely does anything warrant the now elusive phone call!  In fact the other day, I was met with a "You still have a home phone?  Why?"

There is NOTHING raw and real about social media, nothing raw and real about a text message!  Some days are hard and some days are dark, we've all been there!  On these dark days we hide behind the screen, pretending that we are fine when we should be releasing our inner beast with a trusted friend!  Instead we answer the tone less text messages and emails and no one knows we could really use a hug!  In the day and age where we have 100's of "friends" our generation is the loneliest generation yet!  People know so much information about us but no one really knows us!

We peruse our friends profiles, and we think we are "connected" with them and their family!  We watch their children grow and we "like" their status' when we hear of all their accomplishments!  We have 426 "friends", we have 92 people wish us happy birthday, yet we are a lonely and disconnected society!  

We are so busy comparing ourselves to these carefully edited social media accounts with these perfect moms who have seemingly perfect husbands, a perfect (and clean) home, and always delicious meals (don't tell me you haven't noticed) and Pinterestesque birthday parties that we could never pull off, that we forget to just be happy with the simple things in life!  We forget to actually live our lives outside of the internet!  We forget to explore the world (while we browse the internet for photos of foreign lands and add it to the list of places we'd like to visit but never will)! 

I am sad for my kids that the internet has even brought bullying to a whole new level!  When we were kids and someone was teasing us (because that's what bullying was called back then) we could escape the mean kid everyday after school!  We went home, played outdoors, played with the neighborhood kids, read books, and built forts!  NOW cyber bullying ensures that no place is safe, Facebook hate groups, group texting, and other avenues this old lady probably doesn't even know about makes bullying follow kids around day and night!

 I am often tempted to hit the delete button on my Facebook account, but it does serve a purpose!  so for now I am concentrating on living a real and raw existence in REAL LIFE!  Experiencing as much human interaction and soaking up as much real life as I can!  I hope you will join me in putting down your phones and making some real contact today!

SAHM - Stretching your money

As a stay at home mom part of my job (besides caring for my boys) is to make my husbands pay check stretch as far as possible!

I have 2 boys (4 and 6) and I like them to have nice (and clean) clothes!  We are a single family home but we aren't bums!  

There are a few items I splurge on each year and think it's worth spending money on!  I think good quality shoes are a MUST!  Good winter boots are important and so is a good warm winter jacket!  I  am lucky as I have 2 boys and can often get 2 years for each boy out of a good quality winter jacket!  but here is how I save money on the other items that my boys always seem to need!

BUY OFF SEASON:  buy next summers wardrobe at the end of summer!  Clearance prices are usually 75% off in August, and if you can guess what size they will be in the following summer that is huge savings!  The same goes for winter, last year in January I bought my 3 year old this winters jacket for $15 (regularly $89.99)!  

BUY SECOND HAND: I don't go to places like Value Village or the Salvation Army often for several reasons 1) the smell really bothers me and I find it hard to find GOOD QUALITY clothing that my sons (or I) will like!  BUT there are some great alternatives when shopping for second hand items!  Check on Facebook for local bidding sites or kids swap sites!  I have purchased books, clothing and toys for the boys off these sites and have found some amazing deals!  A few words of wisdom when using these sites, ALWAYS check the item before you accept it!  Not everyone is honest and if you are picky like me and want them to be in good condition CHECK!  I have purchase $80 boots NEW WITH TAG for $10!  

SIGN UP FOR STORE EMAILS:  they will send you sales and coupon codes!  Old Navy has their $10 denim sale 2 times a year!  I delete the emails UNLESS the kids need something because buying things just because they are on sale DOES NOT save you money!

BUY PAJAMAS A SIZE (OR 2) TOO BIG: I always buy pjs for my oldest a size too big and he can wear them 2 years and then unless they have holes they can be passed down to his brother for 2 years!  Because in reality who cares if your pajamas are a little too big!  I do the same with winter jackets but ONLY a size so they don't look sloppy!

START CHRISTMAS SHOPPING EARLY: I budget for Christmas starting in August and allot a certain amount per pay check towards gifts and I spend time searching the internet to find the cheapest price and often wait it out for things I KNOW will go on sale!  We also don't exchange gifts with anyone outside of family, and with other families that we are close with suggest a holiday activity instead of gifts! (Ice skating, Christmas craft play date, Christmas train, etc)!  So we get to celebrate without gifts! This year we will also be following the "Something you want, Something you need, Something you wear and something you read" mentality adding in a "and something homemade just for me".  You don't need to go overboard at Christmas with gifts, instead use the time to build family traditions and make memories for your kids.

ASK FOR ACTIVITIES INSTEAD OF BIRTHDAY GIFTS:  while I realize you can't just come out and tell everyone who buys your children gifts what to buy, there are certain people that you can!  We ask our parents to pay for things like a family pass for the local zoo or aquarium, family pool passes, skating lessons, swimming lessons, etc!  This gives allows us to always have free things to do and keeps the unwanted clutter of extra toys out of our small home!

BUY IN BULK:  We purchase ONLY the items that we USE/EAT ALOT in bulk!  Buying in bulk will not save you money if 75% of the food expires/rots or the product sits in your storage room for 10 years and ends up at a garage sale or in the garbage!  We shop at Costco and purchase the executive membership and our refund each year often pays for our  membership!  Deep Freezes are a great way to store bread and meat (label when it went in the freezer and use the oldest up first to avoid freezer burn)

BUY STORE BRANDS: Did you know that most store brands are manufactured by the same companies that manufacture name brand food items?  Most items are so similar (except in price) that you won't notice the difference and some items may even be better!  Drop the brand loyalty and price out your items to get the biggest bang for your buck!  Try an item and if you don't like it you don't have to keep buying it!  We have a few items that the name brand is worth the extra cost for us but most of the time we will buy what's on sale or a store brand!

RE-PURPOSE AND RE-USE:  This is a new one for me!  I have recently begun find second hand solid wood furniture for next to nothing (its garage sale season, hit the high end neighborhoods and you can score some amazing finds) and I will be re-purposing/re-finishing the pieces to suit our taste and needs!  I may even have found a couple treasures in my mom's garage!  (Blog post will be coming up when the kids are out of school and I start my projects).

DISTINGUISH BETWEEN WANTS AND NEEDS: In a society where we love instant gratification it is hard to make the distinction between wants and needs but once you can program your brain to stop "Keeping up with the Jone's" you will see that wants and needs are VERY different!  I am not saying NEVER splurge but if you don't have the money STEP AWAY FROM THE WANTS!  Remember that a HUGE percent of North Americans have a large amount of debt to have these wants, its just not worth it!

 

There's an oil for that

Several weeks ago I became completely utterly overwhelmed by the lack of sleep that I was getting!  My son (he turns 3 on Friday) HAS NEVER sleep through the night, my other son (5 1/2) has growing pains in his feet and night terrors, I am a SAHM, my husband works so during the week I am on my own dealing with wake ups sometimes as often as every hour (often it's only 1 or 2 times) but regardless I WAS EXHAUSTED!  A fellow mom who had been using Young Living Essential Oils for her autistic son posted about a young Living Essential Oils (she started using them for her Autistic son) and I promptly messaged her for more info! She sent me a link to a YouTube video and I watched it THREE times and quickly made up my kind!  These were going to change my life!  

I placed an order shortly after (I had to sell my un needed double stroller to justify the cost since I don't work and we live in a tight budget) and once the oils came I opened the box and haven't looked back!  I started out working on the sleep issues!  We began diffusing "Peace and Calming" at the start of our bedtime routine, and rubbing "Peace and Calming" and "Lavender oils on the bottoms of the boys feet after bath!  This worked so well on my youngest that he passed out at 6 PM and slept in his OWN bed until 5 am and then back to sleep with me until 7:30 am!  My oldest had a TERRIBLE sleep!  Not to be discouraged as each person has a chemical make up and sleep wasn't so much the "issue" with my oldest more the night terrors, growing pains and getting to bed at a reasonable hour!  The Answer "PanAway" for his growing pains and "Cedarwood" to get him to sleep!  I added cedarwood to our sleep potion (as hubby likes to call it) and now put some Pain Rub (Valor, Peppermint & Panaway mixed in with Coconut oil) on his feet after the sleep potion for his growing pains!  

With such success we have been using the oils for so much more than originally anticipated!  The Pain Rub mentioned above is used on my husbands knee for joint pain and on his back/shoulders for muscle pain!  I use the pain rub on my neck (how do I always sleep funny?) and lower back where I experience bad pain from a car accident!  I have been applying "Theives" to my oldest boys feet while at school to keep him healthy!  I had a cyst on my armpit and "purification" cleared it right up, "theives" for a tooth ache (although I hear Clove is best for this and so Clove is on order), we diffuse "Peace and Calming" when the house is a little too restless (I watch my friends kids and sometimes it gets a little crazy here)!  stress away for my anxiety, lavender in scrapes and peppermint for headaches(and a little in my sons belly button for a tummy ache!).

My (very SKEPTICAL at first) husband has a list of oils he wants us to try (Ylang Ylang for my libido surprise surprise) and I have a large order going in with some birthday money this month!  Our top 5 on the wish list:

     *Di-gize (I have severe stomach issues)

     *Oregano (Duane has skin tags but it has a 100 other uses as well)

     *Peace and Calming (we use a lot of this)

     *Joy (for my anxiety)##

     *RC (for colds)

So why Young Living Essential Oils you ask?  Why not just buy oils from a health food store?

There are 4 "grades" of essential oils!  FLORAL WATERS are low quality, made of synthetic or nature-identical oils, and are the oils that are added to hair and skin products.  GRADE C oils are perfume grade oils that are extended or altered which contain chemicals and solvents!  GRADE B oils are natural or food grade oils (sometimes certified organic) but still contain chemicals and fillers!  GRADE A oils are therapeutic grade which are safe for internal use!  They are pure and unadulterated!  There is only TWO companies which produce oil to this standard (Young Living and DoTerra)

Young Living was MY choice because 1. They have over 20 years experience (new. to Canada last year BUT has been available in the US for over 20 years) and has been the world leader in essential oil research & the distillation process. 2. Young Living oils are beyond organic (NO chemicals, NO fillers just 100% oil from the source). 3. Each bottle is tested in house for therapeutic viability. 4. Young Living owns their own farms across the globe (there is NO out sourcing) 5. You can actually visit the young Living Farms and participate in the harvest/distillation process. 6. Young Living is the only company to submit their oils for purity testing (AIRAISE). 7. young Living has THE greatest selection of oils available. 8. young Living has an unmatched seed to seal process to guarantee the purity of their oils. 9. Young Living Oils do not expire (because they contain NO fillers or chemicals) 10. Young Living oils are safe for ingestion. 11. Detoxify the the cells and blood. 12. Are scientifically documented to carry the highest level of oxygen known to man (cancer cannot grown in an oxygen rich environment) 13. Stimulate the growth of certain enzymes 14. Are small enough to pass the blood-brain barrier 14. Are anti-fungal, anti-bacterial, anti-infectious, anti-microbial, anti-parasitic, anti-viral 15. Provide natural pain relief 16. Boost the immune system 16. Protects against cancer 17. Are more potent than fresh or dried herbs 18. Have NO side effects

Young Living essential oils provide a significant therapeutic benefit just by SMELLING them because oil molecules are very small and volatile. They get into the air, they go into our noses, into our lungs, and end up in the bloodstream providing a very beneficial effect within seconds of breathing in a Young Living essential oil.  Young Living's oils are so pure that they are one of the ONLY company's oils that are safe enough to ingest.  Our feet have the largest pores of our skin and fantastic reflexology points so oil put in our feet can be found in the cells of our entire  bodies within 22 minutes sometimes within 60 seconds

Modern day medicines contain chemicals and some cause serious side effects!   Modern Medicine requires digestion as is taxing to the liver and Kidneys, they target only one issue in the body while oils target multiple issues, modern medicine is synthetic while essential oils are all natural! The more you use modern medicine the more dependent you become (side effects often need to be treated and more side effects are created turning into a vicious cycle), but when you use YOUNG LIVING essential oils your body heals with no sued effects and no dependency so the more you use the more your life improves! ***Please note that I DO believe that modern medicine has it's place and by no means want people to diagnose themselves or rely solely on oils in what may be a life threatening circumstance!  

Have questions?

Want to know more about which oils can help you with a specific ailment? 

Want to know more about how oils work?

EMAIL ME jbrolund@hotmail.ca

Want to sign up as a wholesale member?

1. https://www.youngliving.com/signup/?site=US&sponsorid=1650192&enrollerid=1650192

2. Wholesale Member will already be checked, so just leave that part alone. 

a. Wholesale Members only need to make a minimum order of $50/year to stay active. 

b. The initial sign-up is $173+taxes/shipping and includes the premium kit which has the following: Everyday Oils collection (Contains eleven therapeutic grade essential oils of 5 ml each: Frankincense, Lavender, Peppermint, Lemon, Thieves, PanAway, Peace & Calming, Valor, Stress Away and Purification), Home Diffuser, Welcome to Young Living booklet, Essential Oils at a Glance user’s guide, AromaGlide Roller Fitment, two Lavender Sample Packets, two Peppermint Sample Packets, two Peace & Calming Sample Packets, two Lemon Sample Packets, two Thieves Sample Packets, Sample Packet Business Cards, two NingXia Red 2-oz. samples, Product Guide and Product Price List.

3. My number should already be in the sponsor id and enroller id box: 1650192

4. Step 1: Fill in your information (remember to change your country if in Canada)

5. Step 2: Choose the Premium Start kit. There are other starter kits, but the premium is by far the greatest deal!

6. Step 3: Essential rewards. It is a great program for those who know they will be ordering monthly. It requires $50/month order and in return you earn 10% of your purchase back to use on future purchases for the first 6 months, 15% back the next six months and 20% every month over a year! You also get discounted shipping. However, you can opt out. At the bottom of that section there's a box you can check that says no, thanks.

7. Click Next and Verify your address

8. Verify your account information and click Create account

9. Verify order and click Checkout

10. Choose payment and Shipping method; Click Next

11. Enter payment information; click next

12. Verify order information and, if applicable, enter voucher and click Apply Voucher.

13. Click Submit Order.

You can take it from here. I don’t remember what comes on the next screen and can’t get to it without signing up. But it’s very user-friendly. 

This is a link with a quick reference guide to 100+ uses fort the Everyday Oils collection: http://issuu.com/cassidyharper/docs/100plus

2014

The past 4 years have seen a lot of changes for Duane and I and our little family!  Many less than desirable, some incredible blessings!  It has been a stressful time for us but together we have managed to come to a cross roads where 2014 appears to be OUR YEAR!

I am incredibly excited about some of the things that we have planned this year!  We are both focusing on our health, our children and each other first before anything else!  I have make a choice to eat clean (mostly) and concentrate on my health rather than "weight loss" although this change in my eating habits has the weight coming off at a rate that I cannot complain about!  

I have made a decision to spend more time "present" and less time browsing social media sites which stress me out!  It's so easy to compare myself to other woman, other moms, other families when everyone is putting their best foot forward!  There is too many people who are pretending to be perfect while I live a very real existence that contains lots of wonderful things it is most definitely NOT perfect (nor am I).  Since I have been a SAHM these sites have provided me with downtime which I need but I believe that there are other things that will have a more positive effect on me than stalking people from high school!  I would like to blog more stalk less! 

I want to nurture real relationships!  Spend more time going for coffee with a friend rather than texting them about their day!  I want to send out birthday cards and Christmas cards via real old school mail (stamps and all) rather than simply saying HBD via writing on their Facebook wall (HBD really we can't even write out Happy Birthday anymore?!? What a lazy lazy generation we have become)!  I want to hug more and feel a genuine connection more!  I want to watch less TV (and for the kids to okay video games) and play outside more!  I want to have dirty happy kids at the end of the day!

I want to feel real joy!  I want to have less and appreciate what we already have!  I want to compare myself to no one other than who I was yesterday!   

2014 is our year!  This year we will feel joy!  This year we will become healthier!  This year we will be happier!  

R.I.P Marcia Steele

I'm not sure how to mourn the loss of such an integral part of my childhood!  Marcia Louise Steele was my first friend in life, she became my friend when I was less than 6 weeks old!  It's a silly memory but I remember fighting about who was older when we were 5 or 6 and hadn't quite gotten March and April sorted out in our heads yet!  She insisted she was older and I insisted I was older!  I may have been correct literally BUT Marcia was an old soul even then!  She was my friend because our mom's were friends, but in reality I would have chose her!  She was NEVER boring, always full of creative ideas (mostly how to meet boys), and she was the most loyal friend!

It wasn't until we were 14 and went to Disneyland together that I realized that my childhood friend was an old soul but also a tortured soul!  We made memories that trip that no one would truly believe if my mom hadn't been along to back up our stories!  Earthquake aftershocks, flash floods, ant infestation in our hotel room, a cab driver who took off while Marcia was half in/half out, cockroaches in the pool and Edward Furlong on Space Mountain with us!  I am so thankful that when I was told to choose a friend to come with me on that holiday I chose her because now all I have is memories!

Marcia and I chose different paths in life, she was a wild teenager while I was a little quieter!  She struggled with many demons which aren't my story to share, while I struggled only with normal teenage angst! She lost her mom to Cancer while my mom survived, she lost her brother to mental illness while my family remained in tact!  I married a wonderful man had 2 wonderful boys and she lived downtown single and flirty! But we have always remained in touch, always remained friends!

My last visit with Marcia seems forever ago, and in 33 years that we have know each other we have never said "I Love You" but for some reason she embraced me and said "I Love You" before she left!  My last words to my life long friend were "I Love You too"!

I remember when my mom got the call and she whispered "Marcia's gone" and I was thinking "where'd she go?", then is sunk in, she was GONE!  I was never going to hear that laugh again, or get a random text from her just to make me smile!  She fought her mental illness, she made it through so many tragedies, but it won and now she is gone!

R.I.P my beautiful friend!  I miss you each and every day!  Devon looks at your photo sometimes and says "Your friend Marcia went to Heaven mommy, but don't be sad because she is in your heart"!  My 4 year old can be so profound!  You are in my heart!  You are part of who I am!  As you sister says I have embraced my "Marcianess"!

I don't like babies...

I don't like babies!  Don't get me wrong I LOVED my babies!  And I have loved each and every one of my nephews, my niece and all the miscellaneous babies that have been born in my life!  I have loved them despite the fact that they were babies!  I enjoy snuggling a new baby (who doesn't) BUT I truly enjoy giving them back to mommy or daddy when it's time to change them, or they start to wimper!

Babies cry, babies poop, babies need constant attention!  Let's face it the baby stage is full of sleepless nights, worrying about silly little things, judging yourself about EVERY single decision you make regarding the teeny tiny little human in your care!  The baby stage is full of things baby needs, cribs, rocking chairs, playpens, excersaucers, diapers, diaper cream, special shampoo; the list is extensive!

One of the most exciting moments of my life was when we gave birth to my youngest and I knew that after each stage we could move forward!  I could de-clutter the baby stuff from our lives, start planning vacations, start living without strollers, car seats and high chairs!

My oldest is turning 5 this month, my youngest turned 2 in March, so far I have been excited for each milestone!  I was PROUD at pre-school graduation, where the other moms teared up a little (and a little in awe at what a spectacle they made of it, the MAYOR of Langley gave a speech), I have cheered on both boys as they conquered walking (and shortly thereafter running), I have embraced their independence and their personalities taking JOY (pure joy) in all their accomplishments and growth!  Each year with my oldest I am CERTAIN that this age is my FAVORITE (Except TWO, I HATED Two)!  I am so excited to see what FIVE has in store for my son who has come so far in the last year!

I know not to wish away my children's childhood but often become excited for when my youngest is a little older and we can enjoy certain things that sometimes are harder with a young child!

UNTIL LAST NIGHT:  My 5 year old has a loose tooth!  Yes a loose tooth, it's time to talk about tooth fairies!  This made me VERY emotional!  He is going to lose his first tooth!  This is HUGE!  I am leaving my boys for the weekend with their Nana, WHAT IF HE LOSES HIS TOOTH WHILE WE'RE AWAY!  What if I don't get to play Tooth Fairy for the first time!  This loose tooth has turned me into a babbling baby!  AND I HATE BABIES!

He starts KINDERGARTEN in less than 2 months, he turns 5 in 18 days!  HE IS GROWING UP TOO FAST!  I MISS MY BABY!  I LOVE BABIES because when my boy was a baby FIVE seemed so far away!